They Only Come Out at Night

City Pages

Gubernatorial candidate Peter Hutchinson tells disappointed supporter George Pillsbury that he's not former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani.
Just after the polls close, Congressional candidate Tammy Lee ascends the stage and begins to read her resumé aloud, just in case, you know, anyone is looking for somebody.
As running mate Judi Dutcher looks on, Mike Hatch spontaneously bursts into flames.
Intrepid Fox 9 sleuth Tom Lyden and Famous Democrat Al Franken watch as Patty Wetterling issues an Amber Alert for her missing political career.
MN House Speaker-to-be Margaret Anderson Kelliher, with Martin Short as Phyllis Kahn
The DFL Mime Corps perform a skit on tolerance while awaiting the numbers from St. Louis County
Mark Kennedy speaks to a reporter shortly before torch-bearing villagers chase him from the ballroom
Outgoing State Auditor Pat Anderson ends her concession speech with an impromptu a capella Peggy Lee medley.
The big tent: Where plaid and herringbone walk side by side in harmony
WCCO-TV yearbook editor Esme Murphy interviews GOP prom queen Michele Bachmann
Soon-to-be-forgotten Alan Fine: still working on the wave
Michele Bachmann pauses during a ceaseless round of television interviews to take a congratulatory phone call from God
Ex-somebody Mark Kennedy counts down to his last television appearance
John Kline refuses to let anyone leave the room until he gets his favorite pen back
Dan "The Ox" Ochsner takes a mental picture of Michele Bachmann for future use
The party turns less zany as the evening progresses
Former Senator Rudy Boschwitz loosens his imaginary necktie during a grueling interview
Laurie Coleman sets her bullshit detector to "vibrate"
Defeated Secretary of State Mary Kiffmeyer pauses during her concession speech to seek comfort from her husband, former State Legislator and anti-dildo crusader Ralph Kiffmeyer
"So the agent says, 'what do you call your act?' and the father says, 'The Aristocrats!' Thank you! Good night, everybody!"

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