Draft Magazine recently named the 150 Best Beer Bars in America, and three from Minnesota made the cut: Two in St. Paul and one in Minneapolis. Any Minnesota beer fans worth their malt should be able to name the two east of the Mississippi (hint: they're named after an unkempt farm animal and a gleeful dwarf). But surprisingly, only one bar in all of Minneapolis made the cut: The Blue Nile.
Don't get me wrong—I'm not trying to steal any glory from the Nile. Their selection of, respect for, and events featuring craft beer are not to be messed with. (Case in point: Check out their Surly Four release party next Tuesday, or their "Imperial March" big beer celebration on March 14.) But I couldn't help but wonder if the person in charge of Draft's Midwest section of the list could have dug a little deeper. Had they been to Acadia? Stub & Herb's (which nabbed a spot on Beer Advocate's "Top 25 Places on Earth to Have a Pint")? Buster's on 28th? Bulldog NE? Town Hall? Cafe Twenty Eight (okay, not exactly a bar, but a mini-mecca nonetheless)? Triple Rock Social Club? BLB?
All of which raises the obvious question: If you lived in some alternate universe where the punishment for expired license tabs was 10 years of confinement in the Twin City of your choice, and because of the Great Food and Beverage Wars of 2017, your only source for sustenance were the beer-centric bars contained within the geographic limits of each respective city, where would you choose to carry out your sentence?