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Top 5: Best food lines in TV/film

In what could easily become a regular monthly? weekly? feature, we bring you our Top 5 (the Top 5 we could readily come up with at least -- there are like a million, after all) favorite lines from television and film, including commercials. You'll note that many good lines are made that much better by being set to song and dance.

1. "Cin-na-mon-a-mon-a-mon!" Anything involving a) the Muppets and b) specifically the Swedish Chef is surefire, with Sesame Street characters (Cookie Monster and the Count, specifically) following closely behind. This cereal commercial from the 80s is off the hook. Whatever happened to Croonchy Stars?

 


2. "We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup." There's lots of funny food-related lines and scenes in "Elf," mostly involving Buddy the Elf's massive intake of sugar and pairing of incongruous ingredients like Pop Tarts and spaghetti. Here's part of the dialogue featuring arguably the best line, between Buddy and his father's wife, played by Mary Steenbergen, when she sees him dousing his breakfast spaghetti with maple syrup:

Emily: You sure like sugar, huh? Buddy: Does syrup have sugar in it? Emily: Yes. Buddy: Then YES! We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup.

The clip features the scene shortly following this conversation.

Check out all that crap he heaps on!

 

3. "You take a hot dog, stuff it with some jack cheese, fold it it in a pizza ... you've got Cheesy Blasters!" Beautiful. From the opening scene of this year's season premiere of "30 Rock," when Liz enthusiastically recognizes the dish being placed before her. Don't forget to say "pizza" with the accent on the first syllable, and to do the little upper body dance move along with it. Yeah!

 

4. "Don't look at me, I'm fucked up on cornbread." From the first season of "Weeds," when Nancy is going over plans to open her fake bakery with Dean, her "lawyer," and Doug, her "accountant." A couple episodes earlier, she had stolen her drug dealer Heylia's cornbread recipe. You can use this line yourself more often than you think.

 

5. "You don't win friends with salad! You don't win friends with salad!" No Top 5 list of food-related lines would be complete without reference to "The Simpsons" episode "Lisa the Vegetarian:"

Homer: Look kids! I just got my party invitiations back from the printers. Lisa: [Reading the invitation.] "Come to Homer's BBBQ. The extra B is for BYOBB." Bart: What's that extra B for? Homer: It's a typo. Lisa: Dad! Can't you have some other type of party, one where you don't serve meat? Homer: All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there was no meat, I would say 'Yo Goober! Where's the meat!?'. I'm trying to impress people here Lisa. You don't win friends with salad.

Bart dances in.

Bart: [Musically.] You don't win friends with salad! You don't win friends with salad! You don't win friends with salad! [Homer, {and then Marge, join in.}] Lisa: Mom! Marge: I don't mean to take sides, I just got caught up in the rhythm.

The lamb chop scene, from the same episode, has some gems too.

Ok, your turn. Help us come up with some more!


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