The 5 most grotesque eating challenges to boost your patriotic spirit
DENIS JEONG PLASTER
In just a few short hours, everyone and their mom will be sporting their finest Old Navy American flag t-shirt and taking pictures of fireworks that they will never look at again. Independence Day has arrived.
While everyone has his or her own way of celebrating the Fourth of July, the one thing that everyone can agree on is the fact that there is nothing more patriotic than competitive eating.
No matter where you're planning to watch people gorge themselves for America, we're helping you get a jump-start on the festivities by preparing you with five of the grossest, strangest and most amazing eating challenges ever.
Remember a couple of years ago when everyone flipped out about Twinkies being discontinued? This is why it should have stayed that way. Watch this dude as he chokes down 33 Twinkies in 60 seconds, completely alone in what appears to be his backyard.
SPOILER: He doesn't get a girlfriend at the end.
Kobayashi vs. Bear - Hot Dog Eating Contest
If you've ever checked out competitive eating, then you know the name Kobayashi. This crazy-ripped bro was the man to beat for years at the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest, until he had an ugly falling out with Major League Eating.
Before his decline into obscurity, the man known as "The Tsunami" was featured on his own Fox special (because of COURSE Fox would air this), trying to eat more hot dogs than a bear. No, really. An actual bear.
We won't spoil the ending, but don't fast-forward too quickly; we don't want you to miss the part where Michael Buffer introduces the bear like a heavyweight champ.
Thanksgiving Dinner Challenge
After the reign of Kobayashi came to an end, a man by the name of Joey Chestnut stepped up to the plate, and has won the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest for the past seven years and counting.
Here we see Joey using his talents to get into the holiday spirit on a different day of the year, but devouring an entire Thanksgiving dinner by himself. Exactly the way the pilgrims wanted it.
Testicle Eating Contest
Two important things you should know: 1) There is a real thing called the "Testy Festy," Testicle Festival, which is a celebration of testicles that takes place in Montana each year. 2) There is a testicle-eating contest at said festival. We assume these are cow testicles, but in Montana anything is possible. Please note the number of tank top-clad participants.
Diamond Dog Eating Contest
Lastly, check out this video of the Diamond Dog Eating Contest from a couple of years back, to give you a better idea of what our competitors are in for this Friday at The Depot. Good luck.
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