Insert deep-fried riff here.
Though we've just barely started sailing on summer's wings, paddling the paddleboards, wondering if the short-shorts are in fact too short, replacing the flip-flops, the Minnesota State Fair has announced its new foods for 2015.
And it's bittersweet! The fair marks the end of summer, but there's gonna be food! Lots and lots of it! SO MUCH FOOD.
Here's the scoop, in all its breaded and battered glory:
The potentially good:
Butter Chicken Samosas from Hot Indian (pastries filled with chicken in a tomato curry sauce and served with a side of green chutney). Sweet Summer Vegetable Samosas with corn, peas, and onions also are available) plus Tikka on a Stikka (chicken marinated in spices and yogurt, chargrilled and smothered in tikka sauce)
Hot Tail from the Rabbit Hole (roasted pig tail coated in a scallion ginger sauce) plus Kimchee 'n Curry Poutine (braised pork and potatoes smothered with curry gravy and cheddar cheese, then topped with kimchi and a poached egg)
Pretzel Croissant Sandwich from French Meadow Bakery (gluten-free and nitrate-free grilled chicken breast and ham, Swiss cheese, and fresh spinach smothered in honey mustard and chive aioli, grilled and served hot on a pretzel dough croissant or gluten-free toast)
The potentially bad:
Burger Dog from Gass Station Grill: a burger shaped into a wiener and served on a hot dog bun
Chilled Bread Pudding from Blue Moon Drive In Theater (custardy bread pudding baked and served chilled — sundae-style — with a warm glaze/dunking sauce and a choice of crunchy “Moon Gravel” condiments)
Deep Fried Ribs from Ballpark Cafe (smoked baby back ribs, breaded, fried, and served with BBQ sauce)
Italian Dessert Nachos from Pizza Shoppe (cinnamon sugar cannoli chips smothered with sweet ricotta cheese filling, fruit, chocolate, nuts, and candy toppings)
The potentially Pepto-requiring:
Cowboy Bites from Frontier Bar (sweet corn kernels, bacon, jalapeños, and cream cheese blended into bite-size balls, breaded and fried, and served with ranch dipping sauce)
Cowboy Dave's Cluck and Moo (smashed potatoes, roasted beef, and grilled chicken covered with beef gravy, crispy onions, and mustard BBQ sauce)
Mac 'n Cheese Cupcake from LuLu's Public House (mac & cheese nestled in a breadcrumb crust, then sprinkled with breadcrumbs and frosted with a dollop of Cheez Whiz)
Prime Rib to Go from Coasters (thinly sliced choice prime rib, sautéed peppers, onions, and mushrooms (optional) in a soft bread cone with a side of au jus, horseradish, or Parmesan garlic sauce)
And this is only a snapshot! Forty new foods make up the comprehensive list. See them in all their full-color, food-porny photos here, and then go here for a handy printable list to slip into that fanny pack. Keep those hands free for double-fisting.