Vita.mn semen-eating article triggers Rightwing backlash
Be very, very careful when you're reading a sex column. You might accidentally read something about sex.
That's the lesson "True North," a local conservative blog, is attempting to teach readers after one writer was scandalized by what he read in Vita.MN's last issue.
The question posed is not for the faint of heart, or stomach. But True North writer "Ism" was so offended she's trying to start a campaign to get Vita.mn banned from every grocery store and restaurant in town.
Good luck with that.
Just for context, here's the question that Alexis McKinnis of "Alexis on the Sexes" took on.
Q: Is it weird that a straight guy likes his own cum? I prefer to share it with a girl (lick it off her, etc.), but even when I masturbate I just like to cum in my own mouth or just lick it off my fingers.
So, right, there's that. Alexis's answer starts off by announcing that she's never, in five years, fielded that question. But don't worry, questioner: It's not "weird," at all, according to Alexis, who explains, "the practice of a man ingesting his own semen is actually fairly normal among the sexually adventurous set."
After running through a few of the various occasions and methods in which such a thing might be done, Alexis turns to the environmental issue. Twin Cities residents are always concerned about saving the earth, and it seems consumption of one's own fluids is an oft-overlooked way to help conserve:
"Plus, you're saving trees, water and energy by not using Kleenex or running that hand towel through the wash an extra time."
So, it's not weird, it's safe, and it's the sexual equivalent of picking up litter. Everyone wins, right?
Wrong, says "Ism," of True North, who writes that she was schocked to find out what was actually inside Vita.MN after taking it off the rack.
This publication is free. Any 15 year old who is bored or any 80 year old woman waiting for her food to arrive has access to this filth. There is no disclaimer on the front of the publication which warns about explicit content, and, in fact, Vita.mn appears to the average person to simply be a paper filled with "what's happening in the Twin Cities" type of information.
Well, Ism, now you know what's happening in the Twin Cities: Guys are eating their own semen.
Ism said she took the column to the restaurant manager, and she, too, was "appalled." According to Ism, the manager immediately collected all the Vita.mn issues still on the rack and threw them all out. At that point, Ism's crusade took her to other nearby businesses that carry Vita.MN, where she confronted managers with the "Alexis on the Sexes" item.
Se wants every other like-minded upstanding citizen to do the same, and force businesses to pull Vita.mn from the racks.
"As citizens," Ism write, "it's important for us to call attention when the Left creeps into our communities and spreads their warped agenda onto our unsuspecting children and elderly."
Let's just hope she never hears about Savage Love.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss City Pages' biggest stories.
- Why we removed a controversial post
Sat., Oct. 10, 7:00pm
Sat., Oct. 10, 7:07pm
Sat., Oct. 10, 7:30pm
Sat., Oct. 17, 12:00am
- Homeless youth Don Turner chases down thief in downtown Minneapolis
- Mall of America protest case costs Black Lives Matter's Adja Gildersleve an apartment