Tuesday, August 3, 2010 |
5 years ago
It's a hard job, but somebody's gotta do it
Tim Pawlenty didn't step out in front of a Waverly, Iowa, crowd over the weekend and proudly introduce his wife as an accomplished former lawyer and judge. Nope, he wanted to talk about his smokin' hot arm candy! That's an old story for men in powerful positions. Here are 10 of them and their wives:
10. Oksana Grigorieva
Mel, are you seeing this? Are you enraaaaged?
We have the greatest sympathy for dear Oksana, having not only banged Hollywood's #1 Douchebag, but having borne his child. And what reward did the Russian pianist and songwriter reap for her troubles? A world-famous abusive rant from her former main squeeze, complete with comments that bridged that elusive gap between sickening racism and raging misogyny. We can all see why Mel wanted her on his arm, but the question remains: what did she ever see in him?
Alana Stewart married two famous men
George Hamilton and Rod Stewart both fell for this gorgeous actress, and it wasn't her involvement in quality films like Wasted in Babylon and Naked Movie that caught their fancy, we're sure. She may be easy on the eyes, but she lost major points last year while working on a documentary about her friend Farrah Fawcett's battle with cancer. Stewart reportedly threw a hissy fit about her salary and threatened to walk off the project unless she got what she wanted.
7. Katie Holmes
WHY, Katie? WHY did you marry Tom Cruise
Katie Holmes seemed like such a sweet young lady before she got herself hitched to a couch-bouncing, alien-worshiping nutjob. Nowdays, we're left to wonder what the hell is going on in her head. Has she drunk the Kool-Aid, or does she just hang out with Tom Cruise for that giant sexy nose of his? We'll probably never know - at least until they get divorced and she writes a tell-all book.
6. Anna Nicole Smith
Looking... kind of like a trophy
Admittedly, Anna Nicole Smith isn't so much of a trophy anymore, RIP. But back when she married J. Howard Marshall, an oil executive 63 years older than her, she was quite the prize with rub-on tan, bleached hair, and fake boobs. Unfortunately her efforts were for naught - even after her death, her battle for a double-fistful of poor dead Marshall's fortune is still in question.
These days when someone's described as a "socialite" as if that were an acceptable means of gainful employment, it usually really means "looking for Mr. Right-Sized Pocketbook." There's no doubt socialite Melania Trump struck oil when she landed Donald Trump, one of the richest men in America. In the uncharitable spaces in our heart, though, all we can think is how all the money in the world wouldn't be worth going to bed with The Hair night after night.
2. Jeri Thompson
At first blush, you might not think of Jeri Thompson as a trophy wife; she's a talk show host, a political commentator, columnist, and media consultant, so she's definitely got the brains to go with her good looks. No, what catapults Ms. Thompson onto our list is her husband Fred's, Pawlentyish comment during the 2008 presidential campaign, in which he cited his most prized possession as his "trophy wife." We wonder how long he slept on the couch after that.