The Onion shaves off Tim Pawlenty's body hair: Photoshop of the Day
The rap on Tim Pawlenty is that he's too boring and too nice to run for the White House -- also, he's somewhat of a wimp, it turns out.
But that's all changing. The Onion is reporting that he tried to change up his image by copping the chrome-dome look American tough guys like Bruce Willis, Jesse Ventura and Marlon Brando.
Something went horribly wrong, though: "Pawlenty shaved every single hair off his body this weekend while campaigning in Iowa."
The gaffe followed two other failures at changing up his image, The Onion reports:
Wearing a full-length beaver pelt jacket to a rally in Cedar Rapids, and plugging his hollowed-out earlobes with four-inch stainless-steel ear gauges.
Thankfully, The Onion didn't over-share with its shop job, because we really weren't interested in seeing what smokin' hot wife Mary Pawlenty is privvy to. But we have to admit, T-Paw rocks the shiny pate."This campaign is not about who has hair on their body and who hasn't--it's about real issues affecting the American people," campaign manager Nick Ayers said. "Gov. Pawlenty is a bold and decisive conservative leader, and we're confident voters will be able to look past any recent superficial changes in his appearance and recognize that."
(People, this is The Onion, and Ayers didn't really say that.)
The full-body wax and pet snake are a nice touch, too, though.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss City Pages' biggest stories.