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'Suspicious' woman in neighborhood just trying to get in her damn 10,000 steps

Nice one! Just 9,300 more and you're done!

Nice one! Just 9,300 more and you're done! Getty Images/iStockphoto

This thing about 10,000 steps a day is -- that's just a lot of steps, OK?

Some health professionals think there are things inside your body -- your heart, your lungs, and your brain, to name three -- craving that many steps every 24 hours. (Your feet have asked that you please put them on the couch.) 

Because those organs are apparently not properly communicating their desire, the folks at Fitbit have invented something that goes on outside your body, which reminds you daily that you want all those stomps in your life. 

The other thing about 10,000 steps is they'll take you pretty far. If you alternately pick your feet up and put them down -- most people do left, right, left, but see what feels best for you -- even half that many times, you might look up and discover that you're not in Kansas any more, Toto.

This seems to be what happened to an innocent woman who unwittingly wound up the subject of criminal supicion last week, thanks to a concerned resident in the Minneapolis exurb of Medina (population 4,892, one of whom is really, really nosy).

A Star Tribune police blotter report (later highlighted by Washington Post reporter and Minnesota adoptee Christopher Ingraham) tells the story.

Officers in Medina responded to a "suspicious person" report in the Cherry Hill Court area of Medina. According to Google Maps, that puts our "person" mere blocks away from the Medina Golf and Country Club.

(Faints onto fainting couch.)

Cops dutifully tracked down the alleged intruder in the toney 'hood, and asked what brought her there. Answer: She "lived nearby," and "she was getting in her 10,000 steps a day."

Well -- one wonders, tipping one's top hat back ever so slightly -- can't she go back to precisely where she lives, and take 10,000 steps on her own property? 

Maybe Fitbit should invent a device that monitors how many times a person freaks out for no reason each day. Aim for fewer than 10.