St. Paul pigeons get free birth control


We're not quite sure how St. Paul's pigeon population managed to get this deal, but downtown officials hope the free birdie birth control will cut back the number of these obese ugly creatures pooping on everything in site.

Bob Kessler, head of St. Paul's Department of Safety and Inspections, is trying to convince the managers of downtown buildings to sign up for a pigeon control project to help prevent future baby pigeons from taking over the streets.

Why are they so annoying? Their droppings corrode buildings and make sidewalks unsightly. A giant chunk of a building's facade recently fell in downtown St. Paul and officials suspect those nasty pigeons are to blame.

These pigeons wouldn't be controlling their own population by choice. These unsuspecting birds would see wonderful feeders full of their favorite snacks and would have no idea they are munching on baby prevention meds at the same time.

More from the Pioneer Press:

"The idea is to have a humane pigeon-control program that will reduce the population so we can better manage damage from their droppings," he said. "This is like the sky fell on somebody."

The city is working up a plan that will involve feeding local flocks OvoControl, a feed laced with birth control that prevents pigeon eggs from being fertilized.

With fewer eggs hatching, the population should shrink, Kessler said, reducing the public safety and health dangers posed by pigeons.

Pigeons are annoying and unattractive, but can we set up similar snack stations for the dumbest Americans too? Pick their most likely dinner spot and secretly feed them birth control to help reduce the human population. This mother could have used some of that.