Roland Sterling grabs deputy's junk, foiling return to trailer park

Had the drunk Deerwood, Minnesota, man kept his hands to himself, he would have gone to detox.

Had the drunk Deerwood, Minnesota, man kept his hands to himself, he would have gone to detox.

The holidays tend to bring out the best or worst in people. For Roland Sterling, 2015 definitely brought out the latter.

Around 10:30 p.m. on December 23, a Crow Wing County deputy sheriff was dispatched to a Deerwood, Minnesota, trailer park. The deputy had gotten word that Sterling was tanked and had a physical altercation with his mother, according to a complaint. The Sterling name was familiar, since this was the third time the deputy had been called to deal with the 34-year-old for similar reasons. The lawman arrived under the impression that Sterling had said he needed to go to detox.

When the deputy got there, Sterling admitted that he drank too much — a confession supported by his .255 blood-alcohol ratio. An inebriated Sterling told the deputy that he “can’t afford to keep putting his hands on” his mother, the complaint states. Mom said her son choked her, though she didn’t want to press charges.

The deputy brought the alleged mom-choking drunk to the Crow Wing County Jail, where another officer would drive him to a drunk tank to sleep it off. But by the time his ride came, Sterling changed his tune.

Sterling declared that he wasn’t going to detox and headed for the door. The deputy grabbed him, turned him around, and tried talking Sterling down, reminding him that he initially wanted to go. But instead of chilling out like a good rummy, Sterling “began to get physical.” During the jail room roughhousing, Sterling grabbed the deputy’s radio microphone and ripped a button off his uniform shirt, an offense graver than scuffing shoes at a Brainerd nightclub.

Messing with the man’s uniform is bad enough, but as the deputy tried to control him, Sterling struck below the belt. He reached for the deputy’s crotch and grabbed his junk (better than his gun, right?). At that point it was game over. The deputy quickly broke the cock-hold and a group of correctional officers helped subdue Sterling. Instead of detox, that handful of cop penis bought Sterling a ticket to a jail cell.

On Monday he was charged with obstructing the legal process, a gross misdemeanor carrying a maximum sentence of one year in jail and a $3,000 fine.