Do you have nine minutes to spare to listen to a real estate person prattle on about how to become a "leader"?
Obviously you've got some free time if you're reading a City Pages blog post. But are you really so bored you'd tune in to Kris Lindahl, a man who is clearly very, very proud of his ability to sell houses in what's been a pretty hot market for going on several years now.
"Leadership is about persistence. What's leadership about? Persistence. Did we mention that leadership is about persistence?" is not the description of the latest episode of Kris Lindahl's thoroughly unnecessary podcast; it is, in fact, the TITLE of the latest episode of the latest episode of Kris Lindahl's thoroughly unncessary podcast.
And if you think that's inane, wait til you hear what Kris has to say.
"All great leaders" have "confidence, not to be confused with cockiness," Lindahl says, sounding pretty damn confident in himself. It makes a "massive difference," he tells his listeners.
Does he even have listeners? Have you ever heard of "Behind the Billboard"? Why does Kris Lindahl even need so many billboards?
Why does he need a podcast?
The short answer is: He doesn't, but this especially useless audio broadcast exists anyway, so let's briefly consider just where Kris Lindahl's "confidence" in himself as a leader leads him.
Your followers won't believe you can "win that battle" if you're not utterly confident in yourself, said the man who sells homes and buys billboards with his grinning face on them.
"You ever met someone who's so passionate about what they do, they absolutely love it -- well that's me, I get super passionate about our organization, and super passionate about what we're doing and where we're headed," Lindahl says, apparently trying to make sure no one makes it through the first minute of the episode he dropped on Sunday.
Here's the lengthy and equally self-important description of Kris' really bad podcast.
There are 16 reviews for "Behind the Billboard," and 15 (FIFTEEN!) give it five stars out of five stars. If you think any of those people were encouraged to rate the podcast (and be sure to give it five stars) by Kris Lindahl himself, we're... not here to disabuse you of your suspicions. This is not a five-star-worthy podcast.
It also seems like this drivel might also be aired on some property of the iHeart Media radio network, but we're honestly not even interested enough to check into that. If you're listening to the radio and hear Kris Lindahl attempting to verbally fellate himself while talking as if he'd won battles in North Arica during World War II, you should probably just turn the radio off and do some quiet contemplation about all the mistakes you've made that led to you hearing that shit.
Actually the realest review, for our money (none of which will be spent on any sort of motivational speaking event featuring Kris Lindahl, note smiler and billboard renter) comes from someone who goes by "marvin prune." Last June, marvin gave the show one single star, and had this to say about Kris' efforts at podcasting:
"It's just a bunch of self important insufferable prigs giving phony advice because they like to hear the sound of their own voices."
Listen Mr. "prune," if you think your criticism can in any way shake Kris Lindahl's confidence in himself or his "organization," or the people he "leads"... as a [checks notes] real estate man? Well guess what, you got another thing coming. Kris believes in himself, so much so that he's decided he needs a goddamn podcast to inform you about him, and all the great things he's learned as a man who sells houses to people who want to buy a house.
We'd tell you how yesterday's episode of Behind the Billboard wrapped up, but we 1) don't want to spoil it for you, and 2) didn't make it past the 56-second mark of this bullshit. Anyway, it exists, and we're sorry we had to be the ones to inform you of this development.
Buy a house if you want one. Rent a billboard with your face on it if you think that will make you happy. But for the love of God don't listen to this podcast. Unlike our dear friend Kris Lindahl, you're better than this.
"Find your authentic self," as the show description instructs. But if it turns out your authentic self is like Kris Lindahl's, maybe think twice about "communicating it to the world."