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Playboy spends an evening in Minneapolis

Surprise: Playboy's advice regarding what to do in Minneapolis will leave you drunk and full, but also sexually frustrated.
Surprise: Playboy's advice regarding what to do in Minneapolis will leave you drunk and full, but also sexually frustrated.

Playboy recently dispatched writer Sarah Brumble to spend an evening in Minneapolis and write about it. Suffice it to say the results are more Wall Street Journal than Reuters, if you follow me (UPDATE: A tipster says Brumble actually lives in Minneapolis).

SEE ALSO: Mel Gibson bops around the Twin Cities, asks women to take their shirts off [PHOTOS]

That said, Brumble must've been really hungry and thirsty for booze that evening, as she spent the vast majority of her stay inside various Minneapolis restaurants and bars.

Here's a list of all the eating/drinking establishments Brumble name checks: Triple Rock, Nomad, Palmer's, 331, Bar La Grassa, Icehouse, and Santana's. She starts her day at at 1 p.m. on the West Bank, winds through Northeast for some evening trivia, circles back to the other end of town for a nighttime visit to Allen Christian's House of Balls studio, heads to Eat Street, then makes her way to Santana's for some 2:30 a.m. chow.

And, for what it's worth, she seemed to have had a very good time.

"Long summer days spent on the 22 lakes within city limits reward those who endure the cold," Brumble writes. "Just remember: Don't swim in the Mississippi. That's gross. And don't mention the omnipresent Fargo accent. That's as tired as a knock-knock joke in these parts."

Sure, passages of that sort aren't quite as fun as "Eat breakfast at the Potbelly Sandwich Shop," but at least Brumble's piece has the virtue of being helpful for visitors who might use it for advice about things to do in the City of Lakes. Especially if said visitors are rich and looking to gorge themselves.

That said, how is it possible for a Playboy writer to come to town and not visit Sexworld or one of our fine strip clubs? That's a #fail, Playboy. A big ol' #fail.

-- Follow Aaron Rupar on Twitter at @atrupar. Got a tip? Drop him a line at arupar@citypages.com.


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