After more than a decade of sheer terror at the rise of inventive, never-before-seen baby names, Minnesotans are sticking to the classics when it comes to finding something to call that wiggly thing they made.
The Social Security Administration published its annual countdown of the hottest names for babies, locally and nationally. For the most part, Americans and Minnesotans are going with names that are really, really old.
For boys, Henry ranks first in Minnesota, with 392 children so christened in 2015. Across the country, Noah is number one; maybe some Americans are eyeing the rising seas and hoping their kid's the only one who survives the coming flood.
Oliver is the second-most popular Minnesota boy's name, with 358 born last year, followed by William (339), Liam (321), and Mason (290).
For girls, there were 376 new Olivias in Minnesota in 2015, good for first place. The Emmas got second, with 323; that one also took the prize for most popular girl's name in America last year. Evelyn (272), Ava (265), and Nora (242) rounded-out the top five.
Get further down the list, and we're still getting creative with what we call our offspring. Brooklyn, a New York City neighborhood that has cool bands you haven't even heard of, ranks 22nd for Minnesota girl's names, with 141 arriving in 2015. On the guys side, Jaxon (33rd, with 155), Hudson (143, 41st place), and Sawyer (132, 49th place) all cracked the top 50.
The alternate spelling "Jaxson" placed 77th, with 94; combine Jaxon and Jaxson, and they're even more popular than the traditional "Jackson," which got eighth, with 235. The classic "Jack" came in sixth, with 285. But what will he name his son? And how will he spell it?
Down near the bottom of the top, the boys list throws up a few of those names most people hadn't heard of until they couldn't stop hearing them: "Ryder" and "Ryker" both made 77 birth certificates last year, tying for 100th place with Christian. Girls' names stay pretty much traditional throughout: Naomi took 100th place, with 55 girls, trailing just behind Faith and Alexa, who tied with 56, and will definitely be feuding in high school around 2031.
We've pasted in the top 25 names for both genders. Click here for the full list.