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Let's take mushrooms and look at Allianz Field's mesmerizing lights [VIDEO]

Show these lights to your parents, and watch them flash back to a "simpler time," or however they want to describe their college experience.

Show these lights to your parents, and watch them flash back to a "simpler time," or however they want to describe their college experience. Minnesota United

Or not, if you're not into recreational drugs. These lights are cool enough on their own.

You'll probably feel like you just got high whether you're on something or not. No one told us these lights would be able to do something this cool!

Minnesota United's Twitter account is quite literally taunting us with how cool-looking this is. Described by one observer as "a massive, mesmerizing lava lamp," this should drive excitement among believers in soccer, Minnesota United, St. Paul, the Midway neighborhood, or just... cool-looking stuff you can do with lighting and coloring.

Let's hope DJ Khaled gives the Minnesota United Twitter account that retweet they're so clearly thirsty for. They deserve it!

Step your game up, U.S. Bank Stadium. (And don't try to take credit for the Minneapolis Miracle; that was Stefon Diggs' doing.) So far, the only interesting things U.S. Bank Stadium's done to date is kill many, many thousands of birds, score queasy food-safety marks, and make a rich man even richer -- bright lights and brilliant colors are way cooler than all of those things!