Two weeks ago, four Juggalos gathered in Suamico, Wisconsin to commemorate the death of a friend who died a year earlier. Jonathan Schrap, 24, felt the moment called for a toast involving a delicious shot of blood.
That's just how he rolls.
Alas, this nectar of vampires is not sold in most liquor stores -- even in Wisconsin. So friend Shelby Neuens made an offering from her own personal supply. According to police, she allowed Schrap to slash her forearm with a machete so that he might fill a shot glass and wet his beak.
Of course, having just one shot is for lightweights and guys who wear lycra, not Juggalos. The foursome soon decided more blood was needed. Neuens offered to let Schrap cut off her pinky finger to replenish their stock.
It took two attempts, but the ringmaster finally hacked off her pinky at its base. Schrap placed it in his freezer, saying he would eat it later.
It also provided an unexpectedly large supply of Neuens' blood, and our heroes had some difficultly closing down the pipeline.
They first tried to stem the flow by using a car lighter to scorch the wound closed. When that didn't work, they resorted to cauterizing the geiser with a blowtorch. This is considered advanced medicine in Wisconsin, where leeches are still used to treat appendicitis.
Later that night, Neuens stopped by her boyfriend's home to show off her newly mauled hand, say police. Naturally, said boyfriend still lives with his mom. And when Mom heard about the carnage, she made Neuens go to the emergency room.
It could be said that St. Mary's Hospital workers don't see patients every day who've willingly allowed their fingers to be hacked off. They believed Neuens had been subjected to some sort of cult initiation, so they called the cops.
Neuens told investigators her story, but insisted no one be charged, characterizing the saga as but a voluntary maiming among friends.
The cops weren't so understanding. Schrap was charged with mayhem and reckless injury.