Jesse Ventura turns ace conspiracy theory detective

​We're counting down the days -- two weeks never looked like such a lifetime -- until The Body goes on the air to uncover "nefarious plots, schemes, and claims" for TruTV.

"This is my personal journey to prove that there is more to these stories than you know about," Ventura says in the promotional material for his new show, "Conspiracy Theories."

"We have credible sources stating their beliefs, and we look into those theories, but ultimately, you will have to be the judge," he says.

Our former governor's journey includes forays into:

Global warming -- Whether global warming is real or not, some people may be using the issue to earn billions of dollars, start a one-world government and control people's lives. Jesse's deep investigation uncovers evidence that could point to one man being behind an entire global-warming conspiracy."

9/11 -- "At the urging of victims' families, he finds witnesses who claim the towers were brought down by revolutionary explosives that were placed in plain sight, but no one knew what they were. Ventura also hears from those who claim the missing black box flight recorders were actually recovered. And he is told a shocking story about who may have been in the cockpits before the jets took off."

Mind control -- "In a remote region of Alaska, a special government research center is said to be testing the High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program, which, some believe, allows radio waves to be developed as a potential weapon. If true, these radio waves could be used to change the weather and control people's minds."

(Editor's note: Maybe that Alaska story explains Sarah Palin?)

Makes one yearn for the old days, doesn't it? In fact it was only last year that Jesse toyed out loud that maybe he could be a contendah again.

"If I see it over the next two to three years," Ventura said in a speech last year to Ron Paul supporters, "If I see it start to rise up and if this country shows me that it's worth it for me, then maybe in 2012..."

Or not. He teetered close to the philosophical the other day with a writer from  The Wrestling Daily.

"I just go where the winds take me. I'm a free spirit. I never came out of high school saying some day I would get elected to public office; that was probably the farthest thing from my mind and never made its way in, but life takes its strange turns."

"I'm 58 years old now, and I think you learn in 58 years that you truly don't know the future and so you just ride the horse and see what trail it takes you down. Sometimes you have to make career decisions, and some are good, some are bad, but they all end up being fun."

"You can only look forward, and you can't relive what you've already done, you can only live what's coming up. That's how I live life. My true goal now is to become as good a surfer as I was a wrestler."

Cowabunga, dude.