comScore

Heinous Moorhead criminals steal little girl’s popcorn machine

Only the most diabolical criminal would steal a popcorn machine from an 8-year-old's lemonade stand.

Only the most diabolical criminal would steal a popcorn machine from an 8-year-old's lemonade stand. Dan Huotari

Eight-year-old Harper Huotari isn’t waiting for America to become great again. She’s making it happen.

Harper and a friend set up a stand outside her grandpa’s Moorhead home, handing out lemonade and popcorn made from one of those semi-old-fashioned machines. Dan Houtari was busy in the garage doing what grandpas do, which is tinker and listen to the Twins game.

The girls momentarily left their merchandising operating to jump on the trampoline in the back yard. This is among the benefits of running your own business; you can leave whenever the urge to bounce on something calls.

They returned in but a few minutes, only to discover that diabolic fiends had stolen their popcorn machine.

Dan says he only heard a loud car drive past. His outdoor surveillance cameras failed to capture the heist. And while there’s an outside chance someone thought the popcorn maker was left at the curb during Moorhead’s Clean-Up Week, that's a generous assumption.

The machine was filled with popcorn and attached to an extension cord running from the house. Only the most mendacious of hearts would presume it was discarded.

Fortunately, the scoundrels didn’t also steal Harper’s new bike, which was parked next to the machine. Perhaps even evil has its limits. Or maybe it just drives a car with insufficient thieving capacity.