It wasn't the cheapest makeover. After six weeks and $580,000, the Hotel Ivy in downtown Minneapolis has unveiled its newly remodeled penthouse. And, yes, it's nicer than that Motel 6 in Moline, Illinois, that work put you in.
The swankification process involved removing the suite's former ceiling, so cufflinked guests can gaze 28 feet up into the hotel's cupola. The two-story pad can accommodate 30 people for parties and at least two in the dual-waterfall shower.
Designed by Martha Dayton, the 2,500-square-foot room promises a private lounge area, electric mirrors, 65-inch smart TVs with surround sound, and a heated marble bathroom floor. Plus, there's a balcony where people can sprinkle money and rose petals on the commoners below.
We can only assume pages in the nightstand Bible are flecked with gold; the towels immaculately fluffed with imported fabric softener. However, we can confirm that this suite de ballers comes with a complimentary bottle of expensive brand-name champagne.
Naturally, the price for a night of living like Ralph Fiennes in Maid in Manhattan is steep — $5,000, or roughly the cost of a 2004 Camry. Then again, if you're in the market for a 12-year-old sedan, the Motel 6 is probably fine.