Wisconsinites like a drink.
What they really like, though, is six drinks.
Then it's time to stop before things get out of hand. Besides, gotta make it home for dinner.
A recent nationwide study ranked the central Wisconsin town of Wausau (population 39,000) as the ninth-drinkin'est town in this here country. Apparently, practice makes perfect; a recent written exchange between a drinker in that town and a local cop makes us think Wausau's got this whole thing figured out.
As the story goes, a Wausau resident was out on the town one recent night, and imbibed a few more adult beverages than would allow for safe driving. Thinking on his or her (wobbly) feet, our noble drinker made one very good choice — to walk home — and one ... interesting one: to leave a very nice note for whichever law enforcement found the car parked overnight in a metered lot.
Foolish, you say? A waste of time? Only going to piss off some heartless, hard-ass cop even more? Wrong. Not on this night. Not in Wausau, Wisconsin.
A few things to note here: 1.) The smiley face! 2.) That officer Jim Hellrood (an American hero, as far as we can tell) took the time to officially print out "PITY GRANTED JUST A WARNING." 3.) That the appreciative citizen then sent the photo revealing their scofflaw behavior to the cops in order to thank them, and 4.) that these same cops saw fit to share with the general public this story of someone getting away for all the right reasons.
This... is awesome. Should we all move to Wausau? Or wait, can we get Wausau to move here? What about just Parking Control Officer Jim Hellrood?
Jim, move to the Twin Cities! Lookit all this stuff! You'll love it here. And if you pull this "let the drunk walk home" trick a few more times, we'll rally in the streets until they make you chief of police.
- What to do about the predatory drunks of Stevens Square?
- Wisconsin man charged with voter fraud says he was just drunk and high when he voted twice
- Wis. woman calls 911 to report herself drunk driving
- Justin David Peterson delivered sandwiches drunk twice in one night
- Drunk driving in Wisconsin? Turn yourself in at voluntary sobriety checkpoint
- Dashboard cam shows Wisconsin man getting arrested for driving lawn mower while drunk [VIDEO]
- Andrew Bishop, drunk Minnesotan, passes out on Wisconsin Capitol dome