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Chadarith Um charged with masturbating in public twice in one day

Chadarith Um loves books, himself.

Chadarith Um loves books, himself.

Quick: What's the least sexy place in America?

If you guessed "a used book store in St. Paul," you'd probably be right.

Chadarith Um disagrees, at least according to charges he's now facing. Um stands accused of masturbating in the Sixth Chamber Used Books store on the evening of July 7. An employee saw Um, who wasn't doing much to hide his activity, and asked him to leave. He did, and was gone before police arrived.

But apparently Um wasn't, you know, finished. About an hour later, he was caught pleasuring himself in a much sexier location: a public library.

Man, some people really love books.

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Police found Um at the Highland Park Library, a few miles away, doing the same damn thing to himself, according to the Pioneer Press. There, they arrested Um before he or anyone else went blind.

The PiPress reports that Um was less than discreet about his self-love: According to the criminal complaint, which was unsealed yesterday, Um's masturbation at the book store was "clearly visible from the main aisle and front windows of the store."

Um faces two charges of indecent conduct, which is just a misdemeanor, not a gross misdemeanor. Still, gross.