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Rick James: The Ouija Interview

Rick James: The Ouija Interview

It's been a while, gang, since our resident mediums have rousted that deceased for a fireside chat. We had planned to interview the spirit of Joaquin Phoenix, but certain arrangements we made to make the interview possible have fallen through at the last minute. So, while we contact a good criminal lawyer, we decided to pass the time with wig enthusiast, master torturer and occasional musician Rick James.

So kick back, good readers, and take a trip down the Superfreak's afterlife. Gimme Noise apologetically presents Rick James: The Ouija Interview.
 


Gimme Noise: Hi Rick.


Ouija Board: (no response)

GN: Rick?

OB: RCK JAME

GN: (no response)

RJ: IM RICK

GN: Yes. We've all seen that Chapelle sketch. When--

RJ: SUPEFRK

GN: Soupfreak?

RJ: (no response)

GN: I'm under deadline here, Rick.

RJ: (no response)

GN: Burning a girl with a crack pipe?

RJ: HELL YES

GN: What the fuck, dude.

RJ: SPRFREK

GN: And that hair.

RJ: (no response)

GN: That awful hair.

RJ: HELL YES

GN: You've got some serious explaining to do.

RJ: (no response)

GN: So, you and Eddie Murphy must have been up to some pretty kinky shit.

RJ: YES

GN: I'm betting Murphy backed out at the torture shenanigans.

RJ: NO

GN: Murphay was down for that?

RJ: DOWN

GN: How about that!

RJ: (no response)

GN: I've heard you're a real ball buster.

RJ: WHAT

GN: As a band leader.

RJ: WHO

GN: I'd rather not--

RJ: WHO WHO

GN: Don't raise your voice at me.

RJ:   (no response)

GN: I keep my secrets.

RJ: (no response)

GN: Who do you hang out with up there?

RJ: BROWN

GN: James Brown?

RJ: ALLIN

GN: Wait. Which--

RJ: HAMSUN

GN: Knut Hamsun? Are you--

RJ: NIETZSCHE

GN: (no response)

RJ: CROWLEY

GN: (no response)

RJ:   JUDAS

GN: So I take it you went downstairs, not up.

RJ: NIXON

GN: Really! He headed downstairs too?

RJ: ELVIS

GN: No great surprise I suppose.

RJ: (no response)

GN: Go on. This is dynamite stuff.

RJ: (no response)

GN: Rick?

RJ: GOODBYE


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