Google "interview with rap group's tour van," and you're not bound to get many meaningful results. But then again, there's nothing algorithmic about Minneapolis rap crew Doomtree.
Doomtree's van MOUNTAIN is sentient. It's a living, Tweeting machine that's somehow absorbed the cerebral energy of the seven-piece indie-rap road warriors and transformed into a pronoun-averse stream of existential wandering. In the all-caps vein of Jaded Punk Hulk, MOUNTAIN has become a vehicle (nice) for the DIY vets to talk about the nuances of what happens when the rubber meets the goddamn road.
So naturally we interviewed the dutiful Ford Econoline about what it's like being the self-aware wheels under one of the country's hardest-working rap groups.
City Pages: How long have you been carting Doomtree around the country? How did you meet?
Mountain: MOUNTAIN WAS BETWEEN RELATIONSHIPS, TIRED OF BAR SCENE. DECIDED TO TRY IT'S JUST LUNCH. HIT IT OFF WITH DOOMTREE RIGHT AWAY — MOUNTAIN ALWAYS HAD A THING FOR SEPTETS. NEVER LOOKED BACK.
CP: As a hip-hop tour van, who are some of your influences?
M: MOUNTAIN ALWAYS ADMIRED KEANU REEVES. PRESENCE, GRAVITAS. EVEN WHEN MOUNTAIN WAS VANLET, NO BIGGER THAN PINTO, COULD SENSE SOMETHING SPECIAL ... X-FACTOR THAT CANNOT BE TAUGHT OR IMITATED.
SPENT SMALL FORTUNE AT MICHAEL'S MAKING HALLOWEEN COSTUME. MOUNTAIN GOING AS SEXY EDWARD SNOWDEN.— MOUNTAIN (@MOUNTAINGOOD) October 29, 2015
CP: How did you gain sentience? Gypsy curse? Haunted by the spirit of an old hitchhiker? Transformer All-Spark?
M: VAN DEVELOPMENT NOT SO DIFFERENT. AT EIGHTEEN MONTHS VAN CAN RECOGNIZE SELF IN MIRROR. MORAL THINKING BY FIVE YEARS. HIGHWAY SPEEDS BEFORE EXECUTIVE DECISION MAKING FULLY FORMED — NO DESIGN PERFECT.
CP: Do you ever get anxious about your carbon footprint?
M: MOUNTAIN TRIED BIODIESEL CLEANSE LAST SPRING BUT GOT LIGHT-HEADED AT HIGHWAY SPEEDS. MECHANIC SAYS MOUNTAIN IS ANEMIC.
CP: What's your favorite rap song about transportation?
M: "80 ON 80." BUT KENNY LOGGINS "DANGER ZONE" IS CLOSE SECOND.
CP: Time to dish. What do the Doomtree rappers gossip about when nobody's listening?
M: THIS QUESTION IMPLIES MOUNTAIN IS NOBODY. MOUNTAIN GOING TO ASSUME NO OFFENSE INTENDED. NEXT QUESTION.
CP: What's the craziest thing you've seen while on the road with the Doomtree crew?
M: MOUNTAIN NOT INTERESTED IN EXPOSÉ. BUT CAN SAY THAT CECIL OTTER KNOWS ALL WORDS TO ALL LITTLE MERMAID SONGS.
CP: What sort of wacky adventures do you have planned with the Wings and Teeth this summer?
M: MOUNTAIN NOT INTERESTED IN WACKY, ALWAYS BEEN PURPOSE-DRIVEN VAN. DOOMTREE CRUSH SHOWS. MOUNTAIN CRUSH TOGETHER RUN ON LOVE, TRAIL MIX, AND REGULAR UNLEADED.