Marilyn Manson threatens to kill gossip columnist


There's a lot that's perplexing about Marilyn Manson's latest tantrum

Here's the dirt-- wanker gadfly extraordinaire Travis Keller (self-described "anti-DJ" and Hollywood tastemaker) included some quips in his much touted gossip column and in an LA Weekly feature about Marilyn Manson, raving in a cocaine triggered paranoia, urging party-goers not to bang his 20 year old girlfriend, Evan Rachel Wood, whom, allegedly, is known as "Snowflake" for reasons that should be obvious to even the most puritanical.

Well, you didn't expect a washed-up old shock-rocker to take that lying down did you?

See? It wasn't so long ago that MM was flaunting bee-jay jokes and wearing dildos.

On his Myspace blog, of all the damned things, Marilyn Manson posted this in response:

I can, but do not need to defend myself And the absurd accusations that the average press has clinged onto. If we need a nude photo of me to prove that I am far different than the soon-to-be-murdered-in-their-home press has decided to fabricate, that is easy. But if one more "journalist" makes a cavalier statement about me and my band, I will personally or with my fans help, greet them at their home and discover just how much they believe in their freedom of speech. I dare you all to write one more thing that you won't say to my face. Because I will make you say it. In that manner. That is a threat. Mm"

Firstly-- Marilyn Manson is still updating his Myspace blog? That's perhaps the most shocking development in his career since he jacked off on the First Avenue stage in 1995. We're die hard ludites here in the Gimme Noise dungeon. But even we know better than to waste words on a Myspace blog. If there's one redeeming factor to Manson's syntactical hodge-podge, it's that he obviously didn't feel it necessary to waste time on a spellcheck.

Secondly, truth is always the great defense against scandal. Is Manson really so outraged that some runty little bloggers are discussing his cocaine use, and his penchant for jailbait scene girls? We're pretty sure those were the precise topics of Manson's autobiography, The Long Hard Road Out Of Hell.

What happened to the Marilyn Manson that would have revelled in just this sort of misinformation? Who touted drug abuses of all stripes, and forced fans to give him blow jobs on stage? For whom no scandal was damaging, and any myth only strengthened him?

Well, there's only one explanation-- that Marilyn Manson was killed and replaced by this bizarre, profoundly less interesting creature. Need proof? Check out his discography  of late. If we were in CSI, we'd mark Brian Warner's time of death at around 1996, when Antichrist Superstar was released.