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Leonard Cohen collapses onstage in Spain

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Well, doesn't he sort of feel that old? Leonard Cohen feels like the sort of artists who was born ancient, like a great tortoise--who, even in his hits as a young man in the 1960s, seemed to be singing from a pain much greater than his own few years could burden him with.

He's been on a world tour at the tender age of 75 for several weeks, and last night at a Valencia performance, Cohen fainted on stage. He was taken straight to a hospital, where he complained of a "stomach complaint" (food poisoning, says the BBC).

Cohen's fainting spell, as seen from the furthest seat from the stage (it happens at 3:38).

He's all right folks, he's ok. Don't worry--with any luck, Cohen's got a decade more time on this Earth to depress the living shit out of you in song.

The fact that Cohen is immediately resuming his touring regimen (which is rigorous enough to make a man half Cohen's age get woozy) leads us to the inevitable conclusion--Leonard Cohen is a robot sent back in time, covered in a hide of human flesh, designed to lower our collective spirits with poetry and songs of love lost.

Well, if any archeologists of the future should happen upon this blog, the residents of 21th century Earth can assure them that Cohen's nefarious mission was a complete success.