DJ Funk, Moongoons have a date with your booty (download)

At a gathering of friends at a loft party on Saturday, local DJ Ralph Laurenn's Work That Muthafucka (free download!) mixtape came on -- the one from 1994 featuring a hefty portion of DJ Funk tracks -- and somewhere between "Big Booty Hoes" and "Let Me Hit That" it was decided that, odd as it is considering its perverse nature, "girls really like ghetto house. A lot."

It's hard to believe that respectable ladies would like a genre of x-rated club tracks parading hooks like "There's some balls in yo' mouth," but, at the risking being stoned to death by local feminists, I'm one of them. Something about all those repetitive, booty-seducing beats can sentence even the most stone-cold ass to a never-ending shakity-shake on the dance floor. 

While Ralph Laurenn was the one who first brought this to Minneapolis in the early '90s (DJ Boogie is another), Chicago's DJ Funk -- rave's dirty old uncle -- brought it to the rest of the world. Well, guess what? It's time to lock up your daughters, because dude is coming here on the 7th to play at Envy with resident DJ Strangelove and the rowdy Moongoons crew.

Dance nights are only fun when the music's hittin' and all the girls are dancing, so this one is sure to be a winner. Just make sure you check your PC Minnesotan 'tude with your coat (don't worry, you'll get both back).