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Pigskin Picks for Week 6

Blah. Any way you slice it, that's the best word to describe the Idiot's thoroughly pedestrian 7-7-1 mark in last week's games. I could spin it to say that in five weeks of prognostication, only once has the Idiot finished with a winning record on his 15 picks. But the real bottom line is that through five weeks and 75 games, the Idiot's record now stands at 32-41-2. That's not too shabby--if you'd Bucked the Idiot from the start, you'd have a fair piece of change in your pocket--but still short of the 60-80 percent lunacy we've come to expect from our wayward oddsmaker.

Enough of this filibuster. On to week 6...

AIR FORCE minus 11 and a half over Army. Even the Idiot has a winning record picking against pathetic Army this year.

MISSISSIPPI STATE plus 16 over Alabama. State gets more than two touchdowns in Starkville, playing a 'bama squad that can't help but look ahead to LSU.

MISSOURI plus 11 and a half over Colorado. Love Mizzou's QB, who should be a Heisman candidate. The Buffs are at home, but still laying too heavy against a capable opponent.

VANDERBILT plus 19 over Florida. Another disrespected road 'dog playing a solid, but hardly overwhelming, large school program.

IOWA minus 2 and a half over Northwestern. The Hawkeyes are coming off a bye week; the Wildcats off a dispiriting loss to Michigan. Bad combination for Northwestern.

MICHIGAN STATE minus 5 over Purdue. Stick a fork in the Boilermakers. Even as a home 'dog, I can't side with Purdue's defense against the juggernaut Spartan O.

STANFORD plus 33 and a half over USC. By Jesus, 33-plus is a lot of points. USC is living out a marvelous dynasty, and playing at home, but the Cardinal isn't exactly Duke or Army. USC by no more than 24.

TCU minus 7 over Colorado State The Horned Frogs are very quietly having a wonderful year. And a mediocre road team like CSU isn't going to interrupt it.

VIRGINIA TECH minus 6 and a half over Miami. When I heard Miami braying about not getting any respect in the paper today, I knew VT had this one sown up. The Hurricanes are bad boyz; they don't do victimhood unless they know they're in trouble.

College "lock" WISCONSIN plus 11 over Penn State. Yes, Happy Valley is a tough place to play. But this is a tossup game at a neutral site, between two quality programs with evenly matched personnel. I think the Badgers may even spring the upset.

And my five NFL picks...

ATLANTA minus 2 and a half over Miami. I understand the Falcons are on the road and that Vick is dinged. But Atlanta's ability to control the line of scrimmage is worth more than a field goal.

TAMPA BAY plus 1 and a half over Carolina. This game feels like a tossup any way I look at it. So why not take the home 'dog?

PITTSBURGH minus 3 and a half over Green Bay. An extremely banged up team against an extremely physical team. Even with no Big Ben on one side and Big Bad Bret on the other, I see the Steelers in a rout.

KANSAS CITY minus 4 and a half over Oakland. Unless Randy Moss is playing possum, Oakland simply doesn't have the horses (how's that for a mixed mammal metaphor?) to keep pace with the Chiefs at Arrowhead.

Last and probably least, my pro "lock" CHICAGO minus 3 over New Orleans. The Vikings thumped the Saints. The Packers thrashed the Saints. It has by now dawned on the Bears that, even with Orton as their signal-caller, they are the class of their division.

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