THE CITY GRITTY >>

• BEST BOONDOGGLE
  Let us review the chronology. In 1997, the library pooh-bahs commence their official mutterings about the need for a replacement for the downtown library. In November 2000, Minneapolis voters respond to these overtures with extraordinary goodwill, authorizing a $140 million expenditure by a... More >>
• BEST BROKEN PROMISE
  In the late 1980s, a private developer and Minneapolis city leaders agreed to a deal to redevelop part of downtown Minneapolis, with the city forking over a $15 million loan for what became the Gaviidae Common shopping complex downtown. In June 2002, the developer, Brookfield Properties, told... More >>
• BEST CAREER MOVE
  Gone. Vanished. Vamoosed, as he might put it. Say what you want about our old gov, but Citizen Ventura still has an impeccable sense of timing. He bailed on running for reelection when he saw the state's budget crisis looking him dead in the eye. He put the kibosh on a musical about his life... More >>
• BEST CHEAP THRILL
  For inexpensive fun, nothing beats sexual intercourse. You can do it with your friends, or with strangers--sexual intercourse is a great way to meet people! It's also the perfect thing to break the ice at parties. But, you ask, is sexual intercourse cheap? Yes--and how! Sometimes you can even... More >>
• BEST FARMERS' MARKET
  One of our oldest and most enduring gathering places, the St. Paul Farmers' Market is celebrating its 150th birthday this year. To celebrate, the St. Paul Growers' Association is adding a new indoor hall that by next year will sit adjacent to the market's dozens of rustic outdoor stalls in... More >>
• BEST FESTIVAL
  What began in 1972 with a small picnicking of activists and a short march down Nicollet Mall grew to become a gathering eagerly anticipated by more than 300,000 GLBTs and supporters each year. Last June, despite a stifling heat wave, the 2002 Pride Festival garnered a record-high 380,000... More >>
• BEST FOOD COURT
  The "food court" is a brilliant concept: something for everyone, quickly and cheaply. Rarely, however, it is well executed. Certainly nobody around here executes it better than the Mall of America. For ambience, kitsch factor, and sheer variety, its South Food Court is unsurpassed. Start with... More >>
• BEST GADFLY
  At first blush, Dan Cole might seem an odd choice for such an honor. Past gadflies have included Barbara Carlson, Leslie Davis, and Dick Franson--political dreamers all. Cole, a.k.a. "The Common Man," harbors no discernible ambitions to elective office, and besides, he's a mere talk-show host... More >>
• BEST LIBRARY
  Perched on the corner of quaint Rice Park, this gray marble building at first seems stark and imposing. But once you step inside the main reading room, oh, the rapture. Six stories high, the expansive room is lined floor to ceiling with books, creating an ambience nothing short of awesome.... More >>
• BEST LOCAL BOY GONE BAD
  You know the world has gone wrong when you can't get decent pub for being a serial pipe-bomber. That's why it's important to recall a more innocent time, when a nice kid from Pine Island named Luke Helder, attending school at the University of Wisconsin-Stout, went very, very bad. The kid was... More >>
• BEST LOCAL BOY MADE GOOD
  David Bloom's first major scoop concerned Iraq. In 1991 he snared a regional Emmy Award for his reporting on Florida connections to the Reagan administration's arms-to-Iraq scandal. Bloom made his final mark on journalism in Iraq as well, reporting from the front lines of Gulf War II and filing... More >>
• BEST LOCAL GIRL GONE BAD
  More like "Best Local Girl Returned to Anonymity, Where She Belongs." But recall that Mowery, the local bartender--or "customer service representative," as she likes to think of it--with the longshoreman's vocabulary, had a brief moment of notoriety as a finalist on Fox's wonderfully despicable... More >>
• BEST LOCAL GIRL MADE GOOD
  Admittedly, we are getting a bit sick of her. It seemed highly admirable--audacious even--when Coleen Rowley first surfaced to blow the whistle on her FBI superiors for ignoring warning signs of impending terrorist attacks prior to 9/11. Her impetuous letters to FBI brass and no-nonsense... More >>
• BEST LOCALLY GENERATED WEBSITE
  First the disclosure: This is not an impartial judgment. CP and Cursor have enjoyed both formal and informal ties since the site's launch in early 1998. We count co-editors Mike Tronnes and Rob Levine among our friends. CP's own Budd Rugg made his debut with Cursor, and CP editor Steve Perry... More >>
• BEST MAYOR
  As anyone who reads a newspaper knows, these are wretched times to be mayor of a Minnesota city. Most days, Gov. Tim Pawlenty appears to be either fundamentally indifferent or downright hostile to the fate of the cities. The state budget crisis has provided him with ideal political cover to... More >>
• BEST MONTH TO BE IN THE TWIN CITIES
  May is honored here not because we dislike winter. If you dislike winter, you should not live in Minnesota. There are too many people here already, and there is no reason to further crowd the place with individuals who are in a bad mood because of snow allergies or thin blood or seasonal... More >>
• BEST PLACE FOR A FIRST DATE
  There are so many reasons not to go to the bars on a first date. You're too young to get in; or you're too broke to buy drinks; or you're old and rich but more and more often find you have to catch your breath before you blurt "I love you" to the stranger sitting next to you. Why let the... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO DUMP SOMEONE
  Loring Park is suitable for any sort of dumping you have in mind. It allows for some privacy but is still public enough to avoid most nasty scenes, is scenic enough for you to avoid eye contact, and, most important, is surrounded by a world of possibilities. Perhaps you'll get lucky and make a... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO GET DUMPED
  When your mother told you there were plenty of fish in the sea, did she know you'd be standing just a few feet above Underwater World? Laugh if you want to, but Mama wasn't joking. She also told you that you'd better shop around. So what better place to split with your sweetie than at the... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET SINGLE MEN (GAY)
  Okay, so it may not be the most romantic club in the metro, but that obviously hasn't kept loads of gay singles from hooking up at the Cities' premier gay-owned-and-operated boy bar. The high-energy dance music attracts an up-for-anything younger crowd not found among Boom's aristocratic... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET SINGLE MEN (STRAIGHT)
  Critic and essayist Anatole Broyard once wrote, "If it weren't for books, we'd be completely at the mercy of sex." And if it weren't for bookstores, especially the old-fashioned ramble of stacks at M&Q, we'd be at the mercy of...other things. The beauty of a bookstore is the browsing. Is... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET SINGLE WOMEN (LESBIAN)
  Finally a queer bar that doesn't feel the need to cover its windows with plywood, deafen us with disco, and smoke us like salmon! Located in northeast Minneapolis, Boom has a relaxed, cosmopolitan atmosphere that says "come as you are," and the grown-up lack of queeny drama-lama-ding-dong keeps... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO MEET SINGLE WOMEN (STRAIGHT)
  Men have it hard in the Twin Cities. Too many young, well-dressed guys in smooth white belts and carefully tousled hair are picking up all the eligible dates in Uptown. Sometimes a leftover suitor begins to fear that the only woman he'll ever kiss goodnight is his mom. Fortunately, on Wednesday... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO PEOPLE-WATCH
  Let's start with the obvious: Calhoun brings out the hardbodies. As soon as our temperamental weather changes from teeth-chattering to merely goosebumpy, rollerbladers, joggers, bikers, walkers, and people in convertibles, many of them quite attractive, come out in droves. All summer long this... More >>
• BEST PLACE TO TAKE OUT OF TOWN GUESTS
  Here in the Twin Cities, we're so accustomed to gorgeous parks that it's easy to take them for granted. With fewer thrills than Valleyfair and far less Santana memorabilia than Hard Rock, Mother Nature still has a leg up on the usual man-made tourist attractions. Pack a picnic (or at least... More >>
• BEST POLITICIAN
  If you've really had it with the myth that Gov. Tim Pawlenty is an affable, witty guy, then Rukavina is your kind of anti-hero. The clashes these two have had at the capitol over the years are the stuff of legend, and more often than not it's the state rep from Virginia who draws the last laugh... More >>
• BEST PUBLIC RESTROOM
  Everything about Tiburón is oversized. A massive fish tank, filled with rainbow-colored specimens, snakes through the middle of the room. Fountains percolate. A long wall that continually changes colors and is fronted by prairie grass looks like an exhibit from the Museum of Natural... More >>
• BEST RENOVATION
  Like so many senior citizens, the Band Box recently had a little age-defying work done. After being shut down for three months, the nearly 70-year-old Elliot Park staple reopened with its capacity doubled (from one dozen patrons to two!) and its greasy-spoon charm still intact. Right now the... More >>
• BEST SCANDAL
  In the grand scheme of things, the sins of the former Minneapolis City Council member don't amount to much. Basically, Biernat was busted for accepting a few thousand dollars' worth of free plumbing work from a union hack looking for a seat on the Plumber's Examining Board. Sleazy, yes, but... More >>
• BEST STATE FAIR FOOD
  The honey sunflower ice-cream vendor is a well-kept secret among people who are fortunate enough to stumble upon it, hidden away in a little corner of the Agriculture-Horticulture Building. Patrons have their choice of two flavors, honey and chocolate honey, both packed with a swirl of... More >>
• BEST STATE FAIR RIDE
  Given the damage so commonly inflicted by fairgoers upon their own gastrointestinal tracts, it would feel irresponsible to endorse a ride that further punishes the body from without--particularly any of the extreme, bone-rattling, equilibrium-disrupting, money-extorting, 45-minute-waiting,... More >>
• BEST USE OF TAXPAYER DOLLARS
  In 1990, DFLers engineered a couple of "matching funds" and state-paid mechanisms for statewide elections that remains an admired model nationally. The idea is to provide a box on income tax returns so that taxpayers can contribute $5 to go to general campaign subsidies--and the individual... More >>
• BEST VICTIM
  Forget the unseemly scuffle in the bathroom stall. Forget that his ex-wife and ex-mistress joined forces and blabbed to local and national media about what a creep he is. Forget that the speedy little Puck has ballooned to the point of wearing a size 56 suit. Forget, even, that Puckett's... More >>
• BEST VIEW
  Most people think a great view is by definition a beautiful view. They want eye candy, be it glorious architecture, unsullied natural vistas, or some combination of the two. By such measures, the view from below the Lowry Bridge doesn't amount to much. But to our way of thinking, a great view... More >>
• BEST VILLAIN
  A great strength of any worthwhile villain is the power to distract. Another is the ability to piss off everyone. Lindner, the Republican state rep from Corcoran, proved to be master of both during a crucial legislative session. The man, who once called Buddhism a "cult," made enough ignorant... More >>