Cameras are set to roll this summer on Howard Stern's remake of the 1981 T&A masterwork Porky's. Timely? You bet. From the Pentagon on down, everything early-Reagan-era is new again--including the obfuscation of everyday vices. Thus, high-profile downtown strip joints like DÈjý Vu and Schieks are as outrÈ as flavored condoms. For lascivious nightlife, the outer ring is in again, and--like Porky's legendary backwoods brothel, the King of Diamonds benefits from being remotely located well off the average ogler's beaten path. Mind you, you're not likely to be chased off KOD premises by any crazed bumpkins. The clean tables and airport-bar ambience are thoroughly common-denominator, drawing a mix of middle-class twentysomethings, dirty-weekend dads, off-campus revelers, a dubious loner or two, and the transient corporate elite ("conveniently located 10 minutes from the airport"). As for the dancers, they're totally nude, and you're totally free to have a cocktail while watching them, sans glass barrier--another zoning coup. Admittedly, there's nothing radical or trendy about the girls' glittery styling, the $10 table dances, or the dÈcor (witness enough neon beer signs to adorn every Sigma Chi house in the Upper Midwest). But with so many inner-city flesh dens getting by on bullshit high-roller trappings or an ironic sense of sleaze, isn't it about time the suburbs reclaimed this critical slice of American pie?

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Location Details

6600 River Road
Inver Grove Heights MN 55076
651-455-3886

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