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2009 Stories by Patrick Strait

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  • Too old for Warped Tour?

    published Jul 29, 2009

    ​Warped Tour photo by gregor_yThis Sunday, Canterbury Park will be inundated by thousands of excited tweens guzzling Red Bull, sporting homemade puffy-painted t-shirts and lining up to buy concert m... More >>

  • Reporter's notebook: Skinny-dipping into history
    FEATURED STORY

    Reporter's notebook: Skinny-dipping into history

    published Jul 24, 2009

    Have you ever heard of East Bethel? Be honest. Thought so. For those who have heard of it, East Bethel is just another small town in Minnesota, full of open fields, liquor stores and meth labs (kiddi... More >>

  • Minnesota's Avatan nudist club sets skinny-dipping record

    published July 22, 2009

    IT'S A SATURDAY AFTERNOON IN JULY, and I'm standing in a pool with 222 other people, all of us completely naked. Behind me... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: How to be a successful wingman

    published Jul 17, 2009

    Have you ever heard of Erik von Markovik? No? Shocker.Wait, maybe you'll know him if I use his other name, Mystery. That's what I thought.In case you still don't know what I'm talking about, Myste... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Pubic shaving for America

    published Jul 03, 2009

    It's Fourth of July weekend and tons of people are thinking about heading to the beach to get their party-on, Weekend at Bernie's-style (not to be confused with partying Weekend at Bernie's 2-sty... More >>

  • UFC fighter Shane Carwin calls Brock Lesnar a "freaking liar"

    published Jul 02, 2009

    Just 9 days out from the biggest fight of his career, and the UFC heavyweight champion continues to be a magnet for controversy.It started last week when MMA website GroundNPound.org posted an intervi... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: 24 hours in the penis cage

    published Jun 26, 2009

    I'm not so good when it comes to peer pressure. I can't really explain what my deal is, but for some reason I've always been a lot like Marty McFly (because I refuse to let anyone call me "chicken... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Debating the sexiness of "Sexy Spring"

    published Jun 12, 2009

    I hate it when people claim to be something without thinking about it first. Like when your grandma claims to be making her "world famous" chili (Note to your stupid grandma: No one outside of yo... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Twittering your face off
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot: Twittering your face off

    published Jun 05, 2009

    Earlier this week, I discovered this crazy new concept that I guarantee you've never heard of before. It's called Twitter. What's that? You've never heard of Twitter? Of course you haven't. That's... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: The truth about Asian massage parlors
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot: The truth about Asian massage parlors

    published May 29, 2009

    This is how stereotypes happen.Last month, an Asian massage parlor in Eden Prairie called Planet Shikoku Rejuvenation Station got busted by undercover cops for alleged prostitution. Check it out. My f... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: The real story of Patrick's prom

    published May 22, 2009

    Last week, I thought it would be fun to take a trip down memory lane and relive the magic of my high school prom while weaving in some tips for all of my barely legal readers (shout out to Chaska... More >>

  • Fancy Ray McCloney

    published May 20, 2009

    Over the past 20 years, standup comedian Fancy Ray McCloney has run for Minnesota governor (as a part of the People's Champion party), filmed... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Creating the ultimate prom night
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot: Creating the ultimate prom night

    published May 15, 2009

    Take a deep breath. What do you smell? That sweet scent in the air is a mix of bad cologne, adolescents and hope.  It must be prom season. The month of May is when high school kids (and 26-year... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Celebrating national masturbation month
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot: Celebrating national masturbation month

    published May 01, 2009

    Let's be real with each other for a second - the world is crazy stressful right now.The economy is garbage, pigs are coughing on people causing the downfall of society and somehow Vin Diesel is a... More >>

  • The Wet Spot Awards 2009
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot Awards 2009

    published Apr 24, 2009

    I love awards.I can't really explain it, it's just something I've always gotten excited about. The Oscars? Awesome. Grammys? Rad. Kids Choice Awards? Fantastic.Which is why it's no surprise that ... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Mackin' on the light rail

    published Apr 17, 2009

    The other day I was on the phone with a friend of mine, listening to her complain about how she is still single at 28, and how she had no idea where she should go to meet guys.I considered tellin... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: An erotic night in St. Paul

    published Apr 10, 2009

    St. Paul, I had you all wrong.For the longest time, I thought that you were nothing more than the forgettable "other child" of Minnesota (sort of like Julie Winslow from Family Matters, or Brendan... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: The ultimate erotic soundtrack
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot: The ultimate erotic soundtrack

    published Apr 03, 2009

    This is quickly shaping up to be the best week of my year, if not my entire life.First, Beverly got eliminated on Rock of Love Bus. Then, I saw two douchebags wearing Affliction t-shirts fist-fig... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Locker room etiquette (a cautionary tale)

    The Wet Spot: Locker room etiquette (a cautionary tale)

    published Mar 27, 2009

    There's a reason why I don't workout. Actually, there are two reasons.First, it's because I don't need to. My healthy routine of tanning, oiling up my abs and dancing on the beach while chicks ro... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: More sweet life advice from the erotic specialist

    published Mar 20, 2009

    Question: What do me, Mystery and Greg Evigan from My Two Dads have in common? Answer: We all give sweet life advice (and we all get by in life thanks to our sweet hair). A couple of months back,... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Rules for surviving a bachelorette party

    published Mar 13, 2009

    Sometimes my timing is so good that it scares me. Last week, I dropped some serious erotic knowledge on you about how to survive a bachelor party (hint: it involves John Ritter). Then on Friday afte... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Rules for surviving a bachelor party

    published Mar 06, 2009

    Guess what? Everyone hates people that are getting married. Everyone. Even your parents. There are so many terrible parties that people have to go to every time one of their friends decides to ge... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Solving the economic crisis
    FEATURED STORY

    The Wet Spot: Solving the economic crisis

    published Feb 27, 2009

    I'm seriously over this whole "recession" thing.People are losing their jobs and no one is doing much to help them find new ones. I know the government is trying to handle problem long-term, but what ... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Educational porn schools my face off

    published Feb 20, 2009

    This past Tuesday night started out the same as any other. I was sitting at home (shirtless, of course) watching a rerun of Confessions of a Teen Idol and enjoying a six-pack of Coors Light (the ... More >>

  • The Wet Spot: Have a barely legal V-Day

    published Feb 13, 2009

    This weekend is Valentine's Day, the second most erotic holiday in the month of February (shout-out to Lincoln's Birthday).  So obviously, you're expecting me to talk all about how easy it is to get ... More >>

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