This week, we went inside the 20-year history of one of the Twin Cities' most celebrated landmarks, Acme Comedy Co. (READ IT NOW. DO IT
). While the event was a celebration of the space's past two decades of comedy, the real story is the up-and-coming talent appearing each and every week at its open-mic night.
Acme's open mic has become the stuff of legend, as some of Minneapolis's most famous comedians came up through the weekly Monday-night showcase, perfecting their craft three minutes at a time.
And while people -- including Nick Swardson, Tim Harmston, and Chad Daniels -- have gone on to do big things in the comedy world after their time as open mic-ers at Acme, there are a ton more who have sucked big time and fallen off the map.
Which brings us to today.
While the weekly amateur event is free to attend and has no drink minimum, that doesn't mean you can't booze your face off thanks to the fallen dreams of failed amateur performers. To assist with this admirable goal, we went ahead and put together the ultimate Acme open-mic night drinking game. Let's get messy.
1. Penis and/or vagina joke = drink.
2. Every time a person opens their set with the word "um" = drink.
2b. If that person then follows up "um" with a swear word (Example: "Um...fuck.") = drink.
3. Each time someone acknowledges the red light (the "wrap it up, ass-face" alert) = drink twice.
4. Any bro who makes a joke about how terrible his significant other is = three fingers of whiskey (also, you must punch your chest like Mark Wahlberg in the movie Fear)
5. Macho dude who orders a carafe of some sort = order your own fruity carafe and slam it.
Joke about a sweet 80s/90s sitcom, especially Perfect Strangers
= buy a drink for a "perfect stranger." Get it? GET IT???
7. Bronson Pinchot of Perfect Strangers fame shows up to do a set = buy a drink for everyone in the bar, agree to give Bronson Pinchot your first born child (I LOVE YOU BALKI!).
This Monday night, instead of getting blitzed by yourself at home like the booze hound-in-training that you are, head out to Acme and make a game out of your hobby while enjoying the next generation of comedy.
IF YOU GO:
Acme Comedy Co.'s open mic night
Mondays at 8 p.m.
708 N. First St., Minneapolis