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Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

The reasons that romantic relationships start and stop are complex, situational, and highly personal. However, for better or worse, you may find that certain personality types tend to float into your world at different phases of your life. Sometimes things end in flames, sometimes these guys end up transitioning into a best friend, and sometimes you put a ring on it. Regardless of the outcome, at least you ended up a little wiser at the end of the day (and with a few good stories to share over drinks).

To complement our "10 Twin Cities ladies you've probably dated" piece, we've come up with a list of 10 Twin Cities archetypes you're likely to have met while making your way through the local dating scene.

See also:
Ten Twin Cities ladies you've probably dated

LOL at this New York Times article about the Minneapolis dating scene

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

Tech Guy's work hours might be spent as the IT guy in an office, manager of a team at Best Buy, or as a Geek Squad member who's always on the road. He may even pick up some extra cash working part-time at Gamestop or freelancing at Game Informer. His off-hours are fully dedicated to the online world. You may meet Tech Guy during a Final Fantasy, Grand Theft Auto, or Guild Wars session. You might meet him gaming on a couch in real life at a friend's house. He might be the guy who cleans the Malware off your work computer and then asks you out for a beer. Regardless, things will get hot and heavy once you take it to Gchat. On the plus side, you'll never have to hide your embarrassing fan-girling over things like Sailor Moon or My Little Ponies from him, as he has his own geeky obsessions and appreciates that you have yours too. However, if you date Tech Guy, you'll have to make peace with his tendency to fall down video-game rabbit holes for days (or weeks) at a time. Also, unless he's an extrovert, he may be a bit anti-social... unless he's in a gaming chat room.

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

The Bike Hipster does not own a car. He does, however, spend about as much money on his ride (and accessories) in order to bike year-round as most guys do on a car. Which is admirable, given that Minnesota's winters can be pretty cruel. Cycling for this guy is a lifestyle, and during the time you date it will be your lifestyle, too. Early meetups will consist of charming rides where you'll picnic or hop in a lake, and you'll find that riding together in the wee hours of the morning is oddly romantic and adventurous. He knows all the roads with bike lanes, and is familiar with the tricky trails, from the Greenway to the Cedar to the river parkways, so traveling with him is like seeing the city with completely new eyes. Weekends will be spent meeting other friendly bike hipsters at annual events, cheering your boy on (and biting your nails) at alley-cat races, and signing up for rides you never though you could do, like the Powderhorn24. It's best to get with a Bike Hipster in the spring or summer, when riding season is at its peak. Things might cool with the changing of the weather. Despite what Bike Hipster might believe, riding year-round just isn't for everyone. But if you end things on good terms, you'll always have a great friend to take bike shopping, and he will always have someone to give him a lift when he really needs it.

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

Commercially Creative Guy understands that he doesn't have to sell his soul to make a living. He didn't get a degree from MCAD to be a starving artist, after all. Sure, his job usually has something to do with designing slick websites, drawing animations for television commercials, or thinking up PR campaigns for media organizations, but he also has a fulfilling creative life outside of work. He might be part of an artist collective, make film shorts in his spare time, or have a studio in northeast Minneapolis where he makes things like print art or wallpaper or light installations. He has an eye for aesthetics, so his apartment is always impeccable, looking like it belongs in a lifestyle magazine. Dates with this guy might involve putting on a pretty dress from Cliche or Primp, sipping a glass of wine on his patio, heading over to a gallery opening, and then having dessert at a quiet little cafe. Soon, you'll start to recognize the regulars at Walker After Hours parties, MPR in-studio concerts, and Wits. While Commercially Creative Guy can fall victim to pretentiousness, he will always be aesthetically on point and up to something interesting.

 

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

Idealistic Hippie Dude is a wonderful person to meet right out of college, as those post-graduation years can be a time when hope is precarious and reality is harsh. This boy most likely attended Carleton or Macalester, and his liberal arts education has increased his awareness of the world outside of his -- most likely -- WASP-y upbringing. As a woman, it can be refreshing to meet a guy who "gets" feminist perspectives and acknowledges white privilege when discussing topics like world news and pop culture. IHD spends his time working at a nonprofit, frequently volunteers, and is a member of MPR (not just for access to Rock the Garden tickets, though that is a perk). During summer and fall, he spends his free time campaigning on issues he truly believes in and occupying various spaces. He is one of the few election judges under 60 you'll meet. The Idealist Hippie Dude might be the one to grow old with, as he'll always hope for a kinder future (and you'll always have access to spectacular weed). However, if the thought of hearing words like "hegemony" and "heteronormative" during a fight over whose turn it is to take out the trash makes your skin crawl, this is probably a relationship that won't survive into your 30s.

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

Is there a Wall Street in Minnesota? Not really, but that's where Mr. Big Time is... in his mind. This guy is all about chasing paper, new opportunities, and making a name for himself. Chances are, he spent his undergrad years as a beer-soaked bro, but got serious in later years, picking up an MBA at St. Thomas. Now, he's got stocks, big clients, and a few start-ups on his plate. Mr. Big Time will catch your attention by bringing you into his glam world, where the stakes are high, and he's living the life. He shops at high-end men's clothing stores, has at least one tailor in his cell phone, and drives a car that is either Italian or German. He'll take you to posh places like Prohibition, La Belle Vie, and Manny's Steakhouse on a "casual" night out. He may know nothing about food, quality Scotch, or red wine, but he always makes sure that he's having the best on the menu. If you've always wanted to live the life of a Real Housewife or the rich folks on Revenge, then this man's for you. However, the need to always be glamorous and tasteful can be exhausting, as is watching Mr. Big Time spend the entire time at a party networking . 


Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

The Bro is a little like the College Clinger, but with a lot more sports. He's got a tight-knit group of guy friends, and when you date this dude you tend to end up with a bunch of instant girlfriends -- whether you like it or not. If you like sports, then you'll love it when your social calendar explodes with all the game-related parties this guy attends. Watching athletics is often about spectacle, and the Bro is often a major part of it. He might be that dude in face paint with a sign who gets interviewed by KSTP before a Vikings game. He might spend his Sundays screaming hysterically at the TV while watching the Twins game at a Joe Senser's. He might be part of the caravan of guys heading to the Metrodome (or to the Nomad or Brit's) to watch soccer. Dates will be filled with plenty of Bud Light, and there will be jalapeno poppers aplenty. Soon, your cable packages will be determined by sports channels offered, and you'll be number-crunching for his fantasy sports league for fun. Is that something you're ready for? If not, you might want to buy one last round for the group and move on.

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

If there ever was a zombie apocalypse, this is the guy you would want by your side. Nature Man is a dude who stays off the grid, and thrives best when living off the land. His daily look -- which is completely unironic -- consists of thick flannel button-ups, heavy-duty jeans, Red Wing work boots, and an epic beard that could get him a high-five from Paul Bunyan. Your first date will consist of a quiet ride along the Mississippi in his small motorized boat, followed by a cozy outdoor fire in his backyard where he'll woo you on a log while grilling deer meat he shot himself. Every handyman repair he makes at your place will be his version of love poetry to you. Weekends will be spent in his cabin in Wisconsin, where you'll hike, fish, help kill animals, and drink unfussy beer like Schell's or Grain Belt. If you're all about the great outdoors, Nature Man is for you. However, if the idea of having a garage freezer dedicated solely to meat seems excessive, and spending time without indoor plumbing is a deal breaker, you will probably need to move on once the bonfire is out.

 

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

Dating the Music Head is your ticket to understanding the music scene past, present, and future. With him, you'll be introduced to all the obscure but great acts, be they Minnesotan, national, and international. This guy will take you out for a beer at the 331 or Hexagon, where there's plenty of free music most nights from multiple local bands. He and his friends talk about musicians' career trajectories the way that teens girls gossip about boys, but you'll find your appreciation for and awareness of different music genres growing with each outing. If he works as a music critic, or is in a band himself, you'll soon be getting in for free at places like the Turf, the Triple Rock, the Varsity, and First Avenue, as his name is permanently on the list and you're now his +1. However, you might find yourself spending less time on other local scenes, as the Music Head keeps his schedule packed with gigs only. You also have to be a night owl to make it work; this dude rarely makes it to bed before 2 a.m. Even if the relationship doesn't work out, your iPod will have changed for the better (although you still love listening to Top 40 when the mood strikes).

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

The Twin Cities are great towns to live in if you're penning the great American novel, and the Starving Novelist strongly believes that he is working on such a tome. He'll charm you with his sensitivity, his romantically bohemian lifestyle, and his ability to notice and articulate the beautiful small details of life. You might meet him in at a coffee shop like Nina's, a poetry reading at Open Book (where he was part of the Loft Program), or at a Books and Bars meetup. When you ask him what he does, he won't tell you that he's a secretary or a barista or a waiter. He'll simply say that he's working on a novel. Dates will consist of cozy afternoons spent in coffee shops, free readings at Common Good Books or Magers & Quinn, and cheap-wine-fueled late-night talks about narrative and character development. Writing is a process that requires a great deal of time, patience, and hope for what the future may bring. Whether or not his idea of the future matches yours may determine the outcome of your relationship.

Ten Twin Cities guys you've probably dated
Ken Avidor

You like baking cookies and making soup, but what about brewing beer? The Foodie/Homebrewer will teach you all about buying ingredients, boiling hops on your stove, and honing your recipe skills. This dude is a culinary adventurist, and is always up for the challenge of trying a new trend or flavor combo. When you date a guy like this, you spend your mornings at farmers' markets, your afternoons preparing meals, and your evenings gorging on the bounty of your efforts. When he's not putting a dish together himself, he's taking you to the newest local restaurants, driving out to slow-food gatherings, or picking up something tasty from Surdyk's, Kramarczuk's, or Mort's to share. As a homebrewer, he'll always have homemade beer on tap, and he'll also be up on the latest craft brews, both local and national. You've never eaten so well, but you also have never gained weight so fast. When you break up, your first meal might be Chipotle, Doritos, and Miller Lite, but you'll come out of the relationship with a greatly expanded palate.

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