Paulbots

Physical Characteristics: They're the Republicans who look like Democrats from a distance, but look like Civil War re-enactors up close.

Natural Habitat: Online meet-up groups.

Ward Sutton

Related Content

• Michele Bachmann's CPAC Obama blast rated "Four Pinocchios" by the Washington Post
  March 19, 2013
• Local man auctioned off bottle of Obama's White House Honey Ale homebrew for $1200 [RECIPE]
  January 11, 2013
• Michele Bachmann embarrasses herself during House Intelligence Committee hearing [VIDEO]
  April 15, 2013
• Patty Wetterling questions sex offender laws
  March 20, 2013
• Minnesota will be one of the states least affected by sequestration, but it's still going to suck
  February 25, 2013

More About

• Ron Paul
• The White House

Personal Disposition: Obsessive.

Evolutionary Purpose: To reduce the constitution to a shrill buzzword.

Place on the Food Chain: Somewhere between Deaniacs and Goldwater Girls.

Feeding Behavior: They subsist off the bunkum spewed by their master, Doctor Paul.

Mating Call: "Ron Paul is a great American and the author of this article is not."

Weapon of Choice: A hardbound copy of Atlas Shrugged to use as a bludgeon (both rhetorically and physically). Also, Google Alerts.

Your Best Defense: Ignore them. Your anger only makes them grow stronger.

Danger Level: Harmless. Their perverse individualism prevents them from mounting a formidable bid for the White House.

... PREVIOUS | HOME | NEXT ...