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SF Weekly
Pinot Bizarre
You won't believe the California wine industry's latest new-age craze.
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Westword
The Snowboard Bandits
They lived for excitement, but the FBI got the final thrill.
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Seattle Weekly
"Trash Fish"
Chuck Bundrant built an unlikely seafood empire--with a little help from Alaska Senator Ted Stevens.
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Village Voice
The Transformation of Mike Bloomberg
How a benevolent billionaire mayor ended up owning us all.
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Broadcast Media
Fakeasmilus permanenti
Published on August 26, 2008 at 1:15pm
Physical Characteristics: Upward-slanted eyebrows framed over beady, TelePrompTer-gazing eyes (what's known in the business as "the Hannity Aesthetic").
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Ward Sutton
Natural Habitat: Echo chambers.
Personal Disposition: Smug.
Evolutionary Purpose: To hold your attention between cell phone ads.
Place on the Food Chain: Just below bloggers, just above paparazzi.
Feeding Behavior: Pack eaters. Even the most inane slice of political bunkum has been known to throw these mic-wielding predators into feeding frenzies.
Mating Call: "As the most trusted name in news, we are now joined by the best political team on television, because more Americans get their news from us than from any other source."
Weapon of Choice: Glitzy, hyper-patriotic graphics; awkward banter between segments.
Your Best Defense: Literacy, critical thinking.
Danger Level: Prolonged viewing may cause existential angst, couch fatigue, and the notion that Lindsay Lohan's sexual orientation is somehow news.
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