Id like to be in the south watching an old white Democrat vote this year, comic Chad Daniels told The Daily Show. Hes probably going to go Republican because his choices are a black guy or a lady. Hes going to walk out and go God damn it! I voted Republican! But I had to; theyre the only one with a white guy. Moving from current events to relationships, he tells an audience: My wife has an English friend. Shes always bragging. We invented your language. You wouldnt even have a language if it wasnt for us. I told her, You spell pneumonia with a p. Good thinking. Gnat starts with a g. She says, theyre silent. You know what? You better be silent before I stab you in the face with a k-nife! His wifes friend got a little meaner. One day she was at our house holding our wedding picture, he says. She said I dont know why she married you. I do. You see the ring barer? Thats our son. Whos the dummy now?
April 29-May 3, 8 p.m.; May 2-3, 10:30 p.m., 2008