Evolution: MMA Fighting

The first rule of mixed martial arts fighting is you do not butt heads in mixed martial arts fighting. The second rule of mixed martial arts fighting is you do not butt heads in mixed martial arts fighting. Just kidding. The second rule is no eyeball gouging. Beating the hell out of people in front of screaming, bloodthirsty spectators could get pretty messy without some guidelines. So to keep things in order, other rules are: Fighters can't pull hair or pinch, no fish hooking (putting fingers in a mouth or nose and pulling), timidity or avoiding contact is banned, and perhaps most amusingly worded, putting "a finger into any orifice or into any cut or laceration on an opponent" is not allowed. The main MMA event at Myth on Saturday is the Minnesota Middleweight Title elimination fight between BJ "Lights Out" Lacey, with a record of 11-7, and Joey "The Sandman" Clark. But it's not just the gents throwing punches and roundhouse kicks; there will also be a female MMA bout between young fighters Alisha Mena and Bridget Ten Bears. They just don't get badass nicknames for whatever reason. For fans of old-fashioned fighting without any kicks or submission holds, there will also be undercards of regular boxing.
Sat., March 29, 5 p.m., 2008