Savage Love

I have been with my girlfriend for over three years. Our relationship has come to the point where we feel that we should either get married or go our separate ways. She is a great girl: smart, nice, trustworthy. We have a lot of fun together. There's just one problem: She hates sex. In her opinion, "sex isn't supposed to be fun." She also thinks our sex life is fine. But every time we talk about marriage, all I can think about is a lifetime of bad sex!

Not Totally Screwed

Don't marry this woman, NTS. Not unless you want to be sending me a letter like this one in two short years...

My wife of two years has no interest in sex. My "love life" consists of my right hand and internet porn. I've tried giving her time without bringing it up, bringing it up, setting the mood with candles, taking care of all the housework, cuddling—everything. But our sex life is dead like Dillinger. I don't want to DTMFA because we have a kid. But I can't stay in this situation forever. Is there some age at which kids are best able to handle a divorce?

Think About The Child

The literature is all over the place on the least worst time in a child's life for his parents to divorce. If you're sure the sex life is not just really dead but really most sincerely dead—if it's not hormones or depression or stress—divorce now and get it over with.

Download Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage.