By Jesse Marx
By Chris Parker
By Jake Rossen
By Jesse Marx
By Michelle LeBow
By Alleen Brown
By Maggie LaMaack
By CP Staff
FixWeedThe ITMFA campaign has raised, as of this writing, $13,500—which is remarkable, considering that the most expensive things for sale at www.ITMFA.com are $5 lapel pins. The total cost of the buttons and pins, envelopes, and postage so far comes to $7,000 (postage is freakin' expensive—who knew?), leaving $6,500 in profit. As I never expected to raise that much money, I've decided to donate half to the ACLU, as promised, and give the other half to Ned Lamont, the man challenging U.S. Senator Joe Lieberman in the Democratic primary in Connecticut. I'm tempted to mail a check to Stephen Colbert, too, as a thank you for his performance at the White House Correspondents Association dinner. But I'm thinking Colbert makes plenty of money, so I'm gonna send him some ITMFA lapel pins in the mail instead—hell, if you could toss a man's salad through the mail, I'd do that for Colbert too.
I just read your response to Obtuse And Flummoxed, who you advised to Google first, ask questions later. Another great resource I've found is www.urbandictionary.com. When I didn't know what a houdini was, that's the first place I went!
Inquiring MindUrban Dictionary has been very, very good to me over the years, and I should have mentioned it. Making matters worse, I was incorrect when I wrote that a person could find out what "CBT" stands for by Googling it. The first results when you Google CBT are cognitive-behavior therapy, computer-based training, Chicago Board of Trade, and the Cleveland Buddhist Temple. (Perhaps there are some ladyboys there, LL?) But if you enter CBT into www.urbandictionary.com, the correct answer pops right up: "CBT stands for ‘cock and ball torture.' Torture can be inflicted by: slapping, squeezing, pinching...the testicles can stand great pain but caution should be taken." Words to live by.
BREAST MILK UPDATE: Last week Capitalist Mom wondered if there was a market for human breast milk—and, holy cow, is there ever. Cancer patients, premature infants, and fetishists are all clamoring for human breast milk. You can read all about it by going to www.thestranger.com/savage/breastmilk.