By Jesse Marx
By Chris Parker
By Jake Rossen
By Jesse Marx
By Michelle LeBow
By Alleen Brown
By Maggie LaMaack
By CP Staff
He lives for freedom of mind, freedom of sexuality, and freedom from women, some of whom call him "Dr. Fuck." He quotes Shakespeare, Aristotle, Wilde, Lawrence, Blake, Mohammed, Freud, Einstein, Jesus, Voltaire, Chesterton, Eleanor Roosevelt, Bob Dylan, and other kindred madmen and -women. Without notes. Without books. All from within.
"When Shakespeare asked, 'What's in a name?' he was referring to that little gold plate on the collar around one's neck with the leash to the organ grinder: Gotta gotta gotta, go go go, do it do it do it. Some jerk writes a book called Everything I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. Excuse me. We never learned to put our toys away, nor did we learn to share them. Langston Hughes said the dream deferred remains fertile. And then it explodes."
Though light on pocket money, he is well-endowed with stories, like the time when he was 11 years old and made it with a goat in "one of those barnyard affairs" that turned into an orgy. Or the Washburn High sock-hop he turned into a bacchanalia. Or the night he hung out with Salvador Dalí in Paris. Or the night he visited Stonehenge and realized he had lived a previous life there, and another life in Ireland, and another as a headmistress, and another still as Cleopatra's masseuse.
In the here and now, sitting potbellied in a suburban kitchen ("The suburbs are the breeding ground of angst and delirium") he fiddles with the effects box that gives his guitar that much-sought-after-but-elusive tin-can Moody Blues sound. Then he performs a perfectly ordinary version of "While My Guitar Gently Weeps."
"Say 'yes' to the seedling within," Mad Peeaire says. "A great tree cleaves to the forest. Say 'yes' to the universe, be neighbors with the planets. 'Yes' is the password to utopia. 'Yes' reveals the one true goddess, and she is crazy, fuckin' nuts about you."
Jim Walsh can be reached at 612.372.3775 or firstname.lastname@example.org.