Savage Love

Your saving grace, STUDD, is your age. An 18-year-old asshole is just as repulsive as a 38-year-old asshole, but there's still a chance--a slim one--that an 18-year-old can outgrow his assholery. There's still time for you to learn that no one is perfect, yourself included, and that we are all damaged goods. Tolerating others is the price we pay for being tolerated ourselves. If you don't learn these things, STUDD, and learn them soon, you deserve to be utterly alone.

I am a 21-year-old single mother. I'm about 5-feet, 6-inches tall and weigh 103 pounds. I run every day and generally try to take care of my body by eating right. My problem is that I hate the way I look. I am actually repulsed by my body. I try to take very brief showers and avoid the mirror when I can. I'm not a prude. The sight of naughty bits doesn't repulse me. But my avoidance of all nudity hinders my sexual encounters. I always want to wear a shirt or have the lights off. This is a problem with my current boyfriend because he says that if I trust him enough to sleep with him I should trust him enough to let him see me naked. He also has told me that we can't continue seeing each other if he doesn't get to see me naked. I have let him see every part of my nude body--just not all at once. So he knows I'm not hiding some monstrous deformity from him. I guess I thought my boyfriend would be more sensitive to my fear and let me stay covered up. Do I owe him nudity?

Wrapped Up

You see your boyfriend's insistence on seeing you naked as evidence of his insensitivity, WU, but I see it as proof that he cares about you. Your hang-ups about your body are irrational and they're something you need to get the fuck over. Hopefully his ultimatum will motivate you to get your ass to a shrink already. For while you don't "owe him nudity," WU, you do owe your boyfriend a partner who isn't a complete nutcase.

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