What We're Smoking: An Irregular Consumer Guide

Availability: The August dry spell seems to be over and prices remain stable. With the fall harvest right around the corner, smokers report heavy use of the "buddy" system. Local chronic "Molly" states, "This has been one of the worst summers ever, proving that a 'friend with weed is a friend indeed.'"

Name Time/Date Location Weight Price Appearance Notes Leaves
Drooler2:00 p.m., 8/2/02Arnold's kitchen, south Minneapolis1/2 ounce$180Dark green; large, loose buds; no seeds.Sid Hartman + Sid Krofft = wrinkly puppet with head up ass leaf1 leaf1
KARE Package1:00 p.m., 9/1/02Tom Thumb parking lot, Anoka1/4 ounce$25Greenish brown; small, dirty buds; lots of stems and seeds.This homegrown Minnesota strain is nothing but a $25 bag of dirty air. Bobby and Belinda would be ashamed to grow this in their garden. leaf3
Rosh Hashanah 11:45 p.m., 9/1/02Wedge neighborhood parking lot1/8 ounce$50Mint-green with orange highlights; full, sturdy buds with a light sheen.Welcome to the High Holy Days. The Day of Atonement will never come! leaf1 leaf1 leaf1 leaf1
Boulder Bud6:00 p.m., 9/15/021977 Ford Ranchero, Colfax Ave. S., Minneapolis1/8 ounce$60Pale green with full crystalline coverage; compact buds.The Boulder Bud is sweet, delicious, and not widely available in the Twin Cities, much like Quisp cereal. Mmmm...Quisp. leaf3 leaf3 leaf3 leaf3 leaf3
Homer Hanky6:00 p.m., 9/6/02Stu's furnace room, Lyndale Ave. S., Minneapolis1/8 ounce$50Light on the green, heavy on the orange hairs, semi-sticky.First hit: catch Twins Fever. Second hit: Radke is the godhead leaf1 leaf1 leaf1 leaf1 leaf1
Purple Pride1:00 a.m. , 9/8/02Parking lot, Excelsior Ave., St. Louis Park1/4 ounce$50Dull green with purple and gold hairs; tightly packed buds.A decent start, but no extra points. leaf3 leaf3 leaf3
B.C. Hay2:00 p.m., 9/17/02Parking lot near Famous Dave's , Minneapolis1/4 ounce$50A deep gator green. Mostly shake.B.C. Hay looks as handsome as a Mountie in dress regalia--but performs as impotently as the Canadian Navy. leaf1 leaf1