UMM-MM, TASTES LIKE BIODIVERSITY: Let's play word association. Sunrise... sunset. Very good. Eagles... hawks. Fine, fine. Wildlife... seasonings. Aha! You've obviously had a sneak peek at Ted Nugent's True North 1999 catalog. Oh, how I love the fall day when my Nugent catalog arrives, when I get to drool over "wildlife seasonings" ($2.95 per), learn how training bows will hone your sons' "pointing instincts," and glimpse a forest-photo mural that "looks so good you'll want to shoot it." My choice for 1999's best offering, not counting the $4,000 option to kill a buffalo with Ted has got to be the infant camouflage outfit ($19.95), described using a first-person narrative that richly, evocatively gives me the all-week creeps. Imagine a curly-haired baby in olive camo. "Hi, my name is Calin. I like to play hide & seek with my daddy. If I didn't fill my pants he'd never find me in my camo baby clothes. He sniffed me out. That's not fair! WAAHHHH!!! One time he spanked me for crying when he found me & poop flew all over the place. He got it all over his hands but saved it for a buck lure when he went hunting. He said it killed his scent! Mom didn't think so." If you want your own documentary proof of the aliens among us, call 1-800-343-HUNT to request the catalog, or visit it online at And remember, campers, as the Nuge always says, "Kill, grill, thrill."

Kristine Heykants

Location Info


Rooster's BBQ Deli

979 Randolph Ave.
St. Paul, MN 55102

Category: Restaurant > American

Region: St. Paul (Downtown)

POP THE HOOD ON THAT SUCKER: On the block where I grew up, there lived a family of six brothers who very much admired whatever it is that lurks under the hoods of cars. They would spend a lot of time hunched over automobile guts with wrenches and rags, and regularly had visitors who came by specifically to pop hoods and ooh and aah. I watched them from the distance of my pack of younger kids, never exactly wondering what they were up to, but aware nonetheless. And I've never thought of them since. Until last week, when I got a copy of the Better Homes and Gardens New Baking Book (Better Homes and Gardens Books, $25.95). You know the kind--the ring-binder-style book every grandma has on a shelf somewhere, the kind with lots of pictures, measurement tables, and facts about pumpkins and flour varieties. Now mind you, I've had an old 1950's thrift-shop version of the Better Homes and Gardens cookbook on my shelf for years; I use it religiously to figure out what to do when I'm out of baking soda, or when I want to know how to make old-fashioned things like jam thumbprint cookies. The news is that this 1998 cookbook has all the old real-life recipes you can't live without--the pumpkin pies, the cheesecakes, the Christmas cookies, the Lady Baltimore Cake--as well as an extended section that covers all the baking anyone's ever likely to do in this lifetime. There's a yeast baking section. There are lots of Martha Stewarty recipes for hand-painted cookies and European chocolate-crowned morsels, yet BH&G substitutes ultra-clear directions and carefully numbered steps for that infuriating "everyone knows how to roll marzipan" attitude. On top of that, there are a bunch of show-stopping gourmet recipes--like Olive Oil Génoise in Strawberry Champagne Sauce. I got all revved up just looking at the book, dazzled with the thought of all I could do with such a compact package. My heart was actually sort of racing, and I began to cast around for someone, anyone, I could share my irrational exuberance with. Suddenly I realized: This must be the weird nutty-hobby passion felt by the boys across the street. Pardon me, fellas, I'm putting on my oven mitts and taking this baby out on the open road to see what she can do.

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